FireBrandt (Kean Bean ;p)'s journal

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Thursday - 1.13.05
1:52 - Only mid level? =p

I am nerdier than 78% of all people. Are you nerdier? Click here to find out!

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Sunday - 1.2.05
6:19 - New Years Survey and resolution evalage, and then some =p

First of all, HAPPY BLOODY NEW YEARS!!!!! =) Let's hope 2005 will be uber awesome. =p

Lemme say last night was crazy. =p Lol...i started out the day by playing with my new phone...the ever-sexy Motorola Razr v3...:

*drools* It is so sexy. Like i would rip your clothes off right now if you were a person sexy. ;p
Anyways, after that whole bit, i grabbed some dinner then hit up Bailey's house for some crazy crazy partyage. The theme of the night was "Golf Pros and Tennis Hoes." Lol gotta love the things my friends think up ;p. Provided to say it was a pretty interesting night. Bailey's house was set up similar to pub golf but instead of bars, we used rooms instead. Some of the drinks were pretty interesting. Lol i didn't actually drink when i got there, as I was planning on heading downtown and needed to drive to the lightrail station. So i watched everyone else partying pretty hard and drinking away. We saran-wrapped Chris's car for random entertainment too, and did a pretty nice job while at it. Lol. I kinda wish i had gotten pics. =p Around 10:45 i headed down to the lightrail station and by sheer fate or luck got onto the same car as my friends i was hoping to meet up Dao, Vina, Cassie, and whatnot. That was awesomeness =). And definitely a good thing too, since i ended up only hanging with the crew for like 20 minutes while downtown with them anyways, most of it being fireworks watching. Blah. That kinda sucked, i was really hoping to chill with them all some more. But i guess not. S'all good i suppose. After that, met up with Chris who was hitting up the bars downtown for some new years entertainment and we rode the lightrail back to my car and headed back to Bailey's house. I slightly broke my #1 rule of drinking, don't drink if you're feeling down, but i didn't really feel that down, just a little contemplative and whatnot. I think. Definitely "lit the asian lantern" last night, at one point triple fisting triple fisting being a drink in each hand and another on top of the head. Lol two of the three drinks were bloody strong jello shots so it was relatively easy to pull off and actually not as bad as it sounds or you think. Hahahahaha, i swear i'm not a crazy drunkard or anything. =p It was fairly chill though, not too much drunken craziness or whatnot. Just some laid back times with the HS peeps, which was good. We crashed around 3 and woke back up around 9ish...I went back home by 10 and then crashed in bed until 4...
And well today was good times too...after waking up from crashing, i went and tossed out side for a good 30 mins with my bro and did some one on ones with him. I love lax. Lol. It's definitely my true love. =p After that, showered and hit up the Colorado Mammoth vs Calgary Roughnecks indoor lax game, which was also uber hotness.

After that, i met up with Sarah Bullock and we drove up to boulder to Jeremy's place and kicked it with all the old high school friends. It was a good night, just seeing everyone together and kickin it like we used to. Kinda sad that those times are now few and far between. I rode back with Sarah to my car, which i had left at the Imperial, and we had a bloody long and good discussion about life and everything...just being really reflective, and wondering about how we were all going to turn out after another dozen years...we also discussed the election (read: rant about American idiocy and our doomed state of foreign affairs) and just talked about the world at large. It was a really good talk and definitely something i miss a lot. The future is so wide open, and just makes life extremely interesting...So here's to another year in our lives ;p. Anyways onto surveyage:

2004 Survey (stolen from a 2003 survey of old)

What did you do in 2004 that you'd never done before? Broke myself... =p
Did you keep your new years resolutions, and will you make more for next year? Lol see below. And the next couple entries ;p.
Did anyone close to you give birth? Lol nope...although something tells me this'll start to change soon enough...freakin' everyone is getting serious and all lovey-dovey. Ahhhhh...
Did anyone close to you die? Thankfully not.
What countries did you visit? The UK.
What would you like to have in 2005 that you lacked in 2004? A great many things one thing definitely comes to mind though.
What date from 2004 will remain etched upon your memory, and why? July 14th, 2004...freakin' gimpage. Bah!!! =p
What was your biggest achievement of the year? Making like 10 saves against Mitchell (6-7 of them being point blank stuffs) to handily win the 2nd game against them...or getting the Edward A. Bouchet fellowship. :D
What was your biggest failure? There were plenty this year too...not sure which one to name.
Did you suffer illness or injury? Illness, and definitely injuries.
What was the best thing you bought? Hahahahahah a tie between Halo 2 and the razr :D
Where did most of your money go? Lol friends, food, and random bits.
What did you get really, really, really excited about? Hawaii and lax....although hawaii was kinda disappointing because of a couple bits.
What song will always remind you of 2004? about 对面的女孩(看过来)? =p Lol that was a major song in Chinese and wildly entertaining, for some reason or another.
Compared to this time last year, are you: Happier or sadder? I think at this very moment I'm happier...I think 2003 was a lot better though...cause I was CASA board then, plus it was a good year of lax, plus there was the first NAAPIMHA conference...*shrugs helplessly*
Older or wiser? Lol older...wisdom gains are questionable ;p.
Thinner or fatter? Lol neither really...i gained muscle from lax but lost it after i was out of commission for 2 months.
Richer or poorer? Lol somewhat richer due to the fellowship.
What do you wish you'd done more of? Hang out with friends, focus on school, play lax.
What do you wish you'd done less of? Sleeping through class =p...worrying about random stuff...again. And less breaking myself too. =p
How will you be spending Christmas? This next year? Or last year? Probably same as always, with the fam and relatives.
Did you fall in love in 2004? Nope.
How many one-night stands? Lol none. =p 
What was your favorite TV program? Family Guy
Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year? I think i'm pretty chill with almost no hatage that i can readily recall.
What was the best book you read? Lol does my behavioural neuroscience textbook count? Lol...yes, i'm a dork. The three Harry potters i read weren't bad though, nor was the rest of the New jedi order series.
What was your greatest musical discovery? Lol Mando and canto pop.
What did you want and get? Lax gear, the fellowship, more great friends, the razr, decent grades, Cultural Connections aideness.
What did you want and not get? Perfect grades ( i fell short in a couple places =p), sleep, a good relationship, Kerry in office, a couple other things.
What was your favorite film of this year? Love actually, lol since i saw it like 5 billion times this semester. My Sassy Girl (cliche yes =p) too.
that I saw for the first time this year? Arnh? =p
What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you? Lol awesome surprise sushi/cake bit in my room with the friends. =) Hahaha and I turned 20...what an old fogey i've become. =p
What was one thing that would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying? Making a big difference around me, or finding a good relationship, or kicking complete arse in school, not getting injured, playing heaps more lax...
How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2004? Evolving somewhat. =p
What kept you sane? My friends and lax and music ^_^
Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most? Lol Keira Knightly or Kate Beckinsale are both bloody hot. Lol and since Liang always talks about her, Boa too. (she is bloody hot though =p)
What political issue stirred you the most? Uhhh the election? =p
Who did you miss? At different points of time:  my HS friends, my Yalie friends, my NAAPIMHA crew, my fam.
Who was the best new person you met? The most of 08 is pretty the LA naapimha crew is mad awesome too, and same with most of the campers from this year's APDC retreat. So hard to choose =p.
Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2004: Don't sprint at a 230 lb, 6'3" midfielder carrying the ball with your arms locked and fully extended. STUPID KEAN! =p
Quote a song lyric that sums up your year: Where's the love, y'all?

 New Year Resolutions - 2004...and how they turned out
1. Kick arse this school year. Lol i did alright with this resolution...i really kicked arse spring semester, and fall semester grades have so far turned out as well as i could have hoped for...but we still have Chinese, which could really make or break my grades this semester. We'll see. =p
2. Stop falling asleep in class. Uhhh spring semester was really good, and i rarely fell asleep in my classes. Fall semester, on the other hand... *ducks his head*
3. Get at least 10 points this season in club lax. Sadly enough, i didn't even get a chance to try to fulfill this resolution, as I turned into the starting goalie for our club team, since no one else wanted to play. I did decently enough as a brand spanking new goalie, as we won all 3 games of the first and last games weren't too good though. My second game i was on bloody fire, stuffing people left and right, tearing Mitchell a new one. And for summer league, i got my first real goal that was a beaut, fired pipe side that threaded the space between the goalie. It was a hot shot. Hehehehe...i would have had a few more assists too if only my team could learn to catch and shoot. And i would have had more goals if i wasn't gimped half way into the freakin summer league season. Bah. =p
4. Help TAS and ViSA kick some arse this year. Also, surpass my predecessors in both positions and be a strong member of both boards. I definitely did all that i could for both clubs this year, and put in a ridiculous amount of time into working with the both to ensure a smooth year. Everything turned out pretty damn well, considering, and i was satisfied with the work that i did on both boards. I definitely was a pretty-on-top-of-things member, which was hot. Put up a new TAS website, and ran around like my head was cutoff taking care of board duties.
5. Be a better son and brother. I've done alright with this resolution, definitely watching out for my brother a lot better and helping him with everything when needed. I hope i'm being as good of a brother as I want for being a better son, i've had my on and off moments. I dunno, being a better son is just so hard to define and hard to keep up with. I do what i can, but it seems like such a vague goal.  
6. "Hsuism to the max" Lol, Hsuism to the max was a fair success...i definitely helped everyone that i could, when i got a chance.
7. Really lay the foundation for my career. Definitely a succesful resolution. Got in really good research time during the summer, received a fellowship that basically sets up my path to professorship, and did a lot of good research and reading into recent works on depression research. As a result, i feel pretty well prepared for diving headlong into my research.
8. Initiate change and growth in the youth programs I'm involved in. Another pretty good success, we started INAAPIMHAYouth and Project Ultra Panda, a service project aimed at the asian community...and although APDC wasn't as good as in years past (2002 and 2003), it was better than some of the relative flop years (2001). I was a senior counselor again and that was super fun times... :D
9. Learn to cook still Hahahaha...this i've progressed a slight amount, but not much. Now i can sorta make a beef stew of sorts, and well i can always whip up some reasonably good fried rice, and perhaps dumplings too (after all my time with TAS and CASA ;p).
10. Expand my wardrobe some more, so it's not just the same crap over and over again.Lol another pretty good success, I've gained a wider range of wear so it's not always the same crap. Lol definitely got a few new things on vacation too so this resolution is ongoing.
11. (Repeat of last year) Totally swallow my pride and summon all my courage up to ask out at least one unlucky girl. This defintiely deserves its own entry. But needless to say, check.

Lol as for the quasi-resolutions list:
1.Stop overanalyzing things. Hahahahaha i've gotten slightly better at this, but not by much. I kinda think overanalysis is better. *shrugs helplessly*
2.Stop worrying so bloody much about finding a girl. Still worrying as always.
3.Stop staying up so late every night. Uhhh if anything, i got worse. =p Lol now it's like a standard 4 or 5 am bedtime at school. Lol and as you can tell from this entry time, it sounds like its the same for at home.
4.Get more muscles for lax.Lol it worked and didn't. I gained some more muscle, not up to 140 i think, but a decent amount. But then i lost a lot of it when i got knocked out of commission by being gimped.
5.Find a girl... =\. Ehhhh...depends on what you mean by find. As i said, in another entry. =p
6.Stop disenchanting all the girls I meet. Lol still have a problem with this...but it's at like 93% disenchantment rate instead of 95% or 100% like before so there's some progress. Lol now if only i could get past that whole friends zone bit too. =p

I'll definitely update more soon (hopefully today or tomorrow) with what i've been up to this break (like LA), a semester/year overview, and then RESOLUTIONS FOR 2005 *dun dun dun*. =p Plus probably rant and mull too. And also include an entry on that whole girl situation thinger. =p Hope that New years was fun and y'all weren't too crazy, and that life is treating you all well. Be well and take care. :D

current mood: contemplative

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Monday - 12.27.04
3:50 - Updateage from LA
Hey hey y'all, what's up? Lol right now i'm updating from the lovely city of Los Angeles...tis another one of those family vacation bits so i get to basically sleep a bunch and eat a bunch...well not sleep so much now but s'all good. Lol i'm still feeling extremely content from the buffet dinner we had earlier this evening (they had freakin' shark fin soup and tiramisu among other badarse is that???? =p) so i'm kinda vegging out in front of the computer. The flight here was a total biatch just cause of mechical problems with the plane we were supposed to a takeoff time of 1:30 turned into 2, then into 2:30, and finally we got onto a different plane to take off at 3:30. Bloody lovely =p. Then on top of that, we get into LA and there weren't any real shuttles running to the dollar car rental office so we waited around for another 1/2 an hour...then another 1/2 an hour inside the freakin office. Lol so by the time when we finishd up and drove to our hotel it was 6:30...and we were originally supposed to arrive at 3...Wonderful. =p Wotevs i guess, the buffet totally made it worth it. Hahahahah it was *that* good.

Break's been pretty good so far, i've seen and talked to a lot of old friends and people i haven't had contact with in forever, so it's really nice to catch up. Among some of the more interesting people i've had contact with this break include Laura Allen, K-Mas, Krista Brune, Jen Cotter, and a few weird. Lol. At least talkkng with a few of them was....but then again it was really cool catching up with them again, so s'all good. I've been trying to catch a number of good movies but really haven't seen anything i've definitively wanted to see, ie Closer, Ocean's Twelve, Blade Trinity, Meet the Fockers... the only exception was that I got to catch Phantom of the Opera last night...SO GOOD!!! =p Lol it also helps that i've been listening to the soundtrack for a while now (this past semester) and that i've really really wanted to see the actual opera on broadway for a while too (i've seen it before but it was fzzy and i think i also saw it in colorado, so it doesn't *really* count =p). I definitely liked it all though, it went by quickly and the visuals were pretty amazing. The singing is awesomely wonderful and the whole thing just rocks my socks...another movie i've seen over break that i'd absolutely recommend is What the Bleep do we know?'s just amazing. You really have to see it for yourself to get a proper understanding of what it's about, but i was totally a fan. It's a pretty intellectual and cerebral movie, so don't get in expecting it to be some light-hearted comedy or something. It's a total exploration of humanity through the lens of science. In this case, it's a union of quantum physics, neurochemistry/neurophysiology, and bits of theology and mysticism into one SEXY movie about free will, thinking, and the nature of being human. least, that was from my viewpoint. But then again i'm a behvneur kid so it kinda helps. Definitely, definitely, definitely check it out. The most intriguing part was the work exhibited by Dr. Masura Emoto on water crystals and words...check out this link to see what i mean. Essentially the structure of these water crystals were changed by the words/environment it was exposed to. The implications are extremely intriguing. I also saw Lemony Snicket's a Series of Unfortunate Events, which turned out to be reasonably decent...Jim Carrey's acting skills definitely helped make the movie as i definitely developed a sense of anger and rage at you know they're a good actor when they can provoke that sort of strong emotion out of you. ;p

Lol i think i need to sleep now since we're getting up early...but I'll update about this semester while I'm on vacation. Lol and then hopefully post it up when i get a chance...with pictures, even. ;p I hope that the holidays have treated y'all well, and i'll talk to you all soon. Be well and take care.

current mood: content

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Tuesday - 12.21.04
20:31 - If you've got the time/are willing to give it a go
I have a good friend who is trying to do the free ipod offer and would be forever grateful if you would be able to help him get his five referrals that he needs. He's asked me to help him out, so I've posted the referral link below. Below is the link, he's included some
notes about some of the offers.

"Important notes:

-Make sure you use an email account that you don't use very frequently and where you don't mind getting spammed. I would recommend that you sign up for a new email account and have your spam sent there when you sign up.
-You only need to fulfill one of the listed offers. Any additional offers completed by the same person will not contribute any more. </span>

The Blockbuster Offer: It runs basically like Netflix. You can rent up to 3 dvds at a time and they provide all the envelopes for you to return everything in. Make sure you cancel at the conclusion of the free 2 weeks trial period. You have to remain a member for the entire 2 weeks, but cancellation is fast. All you do is log-on to the blockbuster site and go into your account, and you cancel via the internet, so it's pretty easy. Especially now during winter break, there's plenty of time to take advantage of the time you'll have to
watch some movies. It's a pretty sweet deal. This is the one that I did.

The RealRhapsody Offer: Download 5 MP3's for $0.99. Cheaper than itunes.

The Credit Cards: Beware that these offers can take up to 2-3 weeks for approval if you get approved. These offers are free, and you can build your credit at the same time. It just takes a while.

Video Professor: I don't recommend this one. If you don't cancel in time, they charge you about 70 dollars and you don't get anything from it. These instructional videos seem stupid. In comparison to the blockbuster offer, at least for that one, you get unlimited dvd
rentals for a month and it only costs $17.49/month.

MyInks Offer: If you need some ink cartridges, this is a pretty sweet deal. If you spend $40, there's free shipping. Please note that most of the cartridges are OEM or refurbished cartridges, so they've been restored to original specifications. You just have to spend over $30, and the offer is fulfilled; if you spend over $40, there’s free shipping too (basically purchase a couple cartridges).

BMG: 12 CDs for the price of 1. They sell legitimate copies of the music too. You just pay for shipping. I've done this offer before. It comes to average about $4/CD for all twelve CDs after taking into account shipping and the cost of the 1 CD you have to purchase. Make sure that you cancel as soon as you're done picking all the CDs you
want because if you stay idle for a while, i.e. you don't select any CDs for shipment, in the past, they've automatically shipped monthly "Featured Selections" that if you don't want, you have to send back; if you don't send it back, they will charge you for the cost of
the CD. That's the only pain about membership. So it's imperative to select all the CDs you want in the narrowest time frame possible and then cancel your membership. But the CDs that they do have are the same as the ones you see in the store but for about 1/3 the price.

For the other offers, I know nothing about them, so I can't advise for
or against any of them.

So here's my referral link again:
</span> "

Thanks y'all. Update is on the way soon.


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6:04 - It's people like him who make me pissed off and hate the world...or rather just religious zealots..

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4:49 - Stolen from a variety of ppl ;p

TEN Random Things About Me
10. I can play the saxophone (alto)...or used to, rather
09. I'm a redbull addict from lax
08. I've started listening to phantom of the opera for study's bloody good stuff of course
07. I'm super ultra competitive
06. The only time i've pulled an all-nighter was when i had to pack up all my stuff at the end of freshman year...
05. myTunes rocks my world
04. i'm a mega-insomniac
03. i have a life philosophy of sorts
02. i'm a science nerd at heart
01. i want to learn to waltz and tango and swing properly

NINE Places I've Visited
09. China (shanghai, beijing, plus like a bunch of small places in between)
08. London
07. Ireland
06. Canuckland (like Toronto and Vancouver)
05. HK (it's not *really* me at least =p)
04. Australia
03. New Zealand
02. A plethora of east coast cities (boston, d.c., baltimore, nyc)
01. Cali

EIGHT things I want to do before I die
08. Study kendo in Newman's Hawaii Dojo
07. Get a service project going in another country (yaaaa NAAPIMHA)
06. Visit the Eiffel tower with a love and stargaze (a meteor shower would definitely be a plus)
05. Learn to drive stick (lol simple but key)
04. Have an awesome family with an amazing, loving wife
03. Live in a foreign country for a couple years (either Sydney or HK or London?)...hahaha and if it's a cool country, pick up a *real* accent
02. Become a professor at prestigious university
01. Make a significant, meaningful, positive, large scale, and hopefully ultimately life-changing discovery or contribution to people's lives, perhaps about depression and its origins/neural bases/and treatments

SEVEN Ways to win my heart
07. Be adorkable (lol ie cute and somewhat dorky...sorta like me ;p)
06. Be really sweet and caring
05. Love having fun and being chill
04. Be understanding and empathic
03. Love me, for all my craziness and quirkiness (and complete and utter lack of game =p)
02. Have a sweet smile and a twinkle in the eye (that look)
01. Be honest and genuine. I'll love you if you're yourself.

SIX Things I believe in
06. Listening to your heart
05. Equality
04. That guys can be major dense arseholes and girls can be crazy biatches
03. Altriusm
02. My friends
01. True love

FIVE Things I'm afraid of
05. Heights
04. Not being loved
03. Being alone for the rest of my life
02. Not making a significant contribution to other people's lives
01. Seeing friends, loved ones getting hurt

FOUR of my Favorite Items in my bedroom (dorm room in this case)
04. Your mom (lol j/kj/k...i meant to say my pictures of my friends)
03. The plethora of posters, mostly lax relaxed
02. My computer (I'm an addict, what can i say?)
01. My bed

THREE Things I do everyday
03. Eat dinner (lol it's the only meal i eat consistently)
02. Shower
01. AIM

TWO Things I am trying to do right now
02. Figure out christmas cardage
01. Stuff to update about perhaps

ONE Person I want to see right now
01. of course.

current mood: bored

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Thursday - 7.22.04
Lol anyone want a postcard from Hawaii while I'm at the NAAPIMHA conference from the 23rd-28th? Drop me a comment with your info here and I'll try to oblige ;p. Hope all is well in life with y'all, be well and take care.

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Wednesday - 7.21.04
12:13 - Re-gimped
Bloody freakin alright, scratch the freedom and arm brace bit, I'm stuck back in the splint/sling phase. =p *shakes his fist at the fates* Grrrrr...this completely sux arse, I'm relegated to being one handed until at least after I get back from Hawaii, the 29th, when I go in for a clinic.....argh. }:(

This all happened Monday night, when I was outside tossing around with my brother, one-handed. I was tossing the ball around with him for a while when the ball hit the stick hard, kicking the butt end up into my left hand, redislocating the left elbow. }:( We were doing fine until that random twist of luck =p. I pretty much immdiately knew it was redislocated and told my mum, who was bloody pissed =p. She called Kaiser and asked if they'd be able to reduce my elbow at their clinic instead of having to go to the emergency room again...Of course we get in there only to find out that obviously we can't go to the clinic to get the elbow reduced and that we'd have to head all the way down to St. Joseph, which is downtown and about half an hour away... So my dad dove me downtown and I waited to get in to the emergency room for two and a half hours!! And of course, when putting me into a temporary splint they totally twist my arm and lodge bone against bone so it was bloody painful the entire time i waited around. =p At 11pm we finally got admitted and thankfully they put me under a little painkillers to ease the pain...but with my wonderful streak of luck, those drugs were wearing off just as the doctor began trying to reduce the swollen mass of flesh and bone that used to be my left elbow. Ow. That was definitely one of the most painful experiences ever since A)the elbow was still tender and sore from last dislocation B)he was using a load of force and twisting my arm back and forth C) my arm was still aching something fierce from the crappy splinting i got from the clinic and D)i wasn't on any painkillers...So ow. Lol didn't pass out from the pain or cry at least =p. Then it was them taking x-rays to check to see if they had indeed been successful or not...and then finally back home at two in the morning. =p

So now i'm regimped and not looking forward to Hawaii nearly as much as before since I'll be doing pretty much was bad enough being in a robo brace but to be immobolized is a kick to the nuts =p. My parents were even considering not letting me go, but i definitely didn't let that happen since I was supposed to give a presentation to the conference. =p life has not been too quality these past two weeks... =\
At least I've had some good aim convos i guess? *shrugs helplessly* =\

current mood: crushed

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Friday - 7.16.04
12:35 - Ow. My Arm.
What’s up folks? Lol figured I’d do an update as per request and plus because I finally have something interesting to write about. Lol. I’ve become gimpy now lol…Or as Liang dubbed me, the gimp pimp. Lol =p

So how’d this happen? Well basically I was playing up top as a middie on offense when one of the attackmen got stripped by a short stick and his defender started taking the ball up. I slide down from my position since he wasn’t paying too much attention and went for the hit. Unfortunately for me, I had my arms locked and fully extended when I hit the guy…lol and also unfortunately for me, he was a big guy, 6’3”ish and 250 and running full speed…so big guy running hard and locked arms=dislocated elbow. Lol. Ow. I pretty much dropped at the spot cause his running through my hit dislocated it pretty bad and I just kinda fell from the shock and pain. So I was on the ground for a couple trying to regain a sense of what was going on…lol did you know when you dislocate your elbow like that, when you try to move your arm you can feel the two bones sorta clicking together? Lol it’s kinda a cool sensation even though you can’t really move your arm lol. So someone put a sling on me and I got Mrs. Mahoney, an old teammate’s mum, to get me to the emergency room at Swedish. Lol I filled out some paper work and got it x-rayed and all…pretty crazy process. They thought at first I had both broken and dislocated the elbow…then thought there was a fracture…then back to being both broken and dislocated…and then fracture…and then they weren’t sure and told me to get a re-eval. After some drugs and other craziness I had gained on a reduced elbow, a sling, and mad drugs lol. I got out of the ER at 11:30 pm and just went back home and crashed. =p

Lol the next day was…interesting. Especially since I had no functionality in my left arm cause it was tightly wrapped in a sling. So eating, showering, and working were all an adventure in and of themselves… =p It definitely was kinda shitty relying on only one hand for a lot of things…lol including typing. That sucked complete arse…I typed soooo slow. =p I was definitely mr gimp yesterday.

Thankfully this morning I went to see the Orthopedist today and get everything re-evaled and figure out exactly what was going on with everything. They redid my x-rays and pointed out a potential bone chip floating near my elbow from I guess one of the tendons or ligaments. Had a funny time figuring out what was going on with my arm, they thought that my radius was still slightly out of place…until they re-xrayed and did a fluorescence (??) which showed a real time x-ray of my arm flexing and noted nothing wrong. Lol that was bloody cool though. So now I’m in a crazy crazy arm brace that makes me look like robo-Kean or gimp pimp still lol. But it’s a lot better because it means I can actually use my left arm to type and move in very basic motions…it still hurts to flex my arm and I don’t have a full range of motion on any of the axes…but at least I can use it and it’s relatively ok. Outlook for recovery looks to be 6 weeks, with high intensity sports (lax) being more like 8-12ish apparently. I need to get it re-evaled before I start playing anything again though. I’m definitely working hard at the rehab exercises cause I wanna get back into the swing of things quickly and heartily…so s’all good =p. But at least I’m not stuck in a sling or cast for a few months…they think by the 4 week mark I’ll be able to start not using the arm brace…score. =p

current mood: determined

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Thursday - 7.8.04
2:15 - From a rather intriguing personality test...
"You are fun, spontaneous, clever and interesting. People like to be around you because of your easygoing nature.

You like to wake up each morning without a plan and see where the day takes you, hopefully on some safe but relatively exciting adventure.

You excel in composition. You know what looks good together, what sounds good together, and what smells or tastes go together. This comes from a higher than normal tuned in attention to slight variations in color, texture, tone, and flavor.

You like to see everyone living harmoniously and can get irritated by whoever is currently rocking the boat and causing problems.

When faced with a problem you are most likely to solve it in the most obvious way, not implementing cumbersome standard methods or finding what is “socially acceptable” first.

Most people you interact with do not really know you. This is partially because of your reserved nature (you don’t tell them much), partially because most other types are less reserved (they spend too much time talking and not enough asking about you), and partially because you accept people the way they are (you don’t feel much of a need to correct and evaluate others, so people don’t realize how you think differently).

In fact, you have more interest in expressing yourself physically, through song, dance, or actions, than verbally, and you may give up too quickly when someone asks for a verbal explanation of your thoughts.

You prefer hands-on practical work. You may tolerate other types of work, but you’re never happier than when you’re building, fixing or creating something you can see, touch, taste or hear. You prefer work which is not fixed to a procedure, but which may, at any time, take an entirely new direction if the impulse hits you.

As a parent or leader you are non-directive, preferring to see what happens on its own rather than lay down strict procedures and give orders. To you it is understood that any procedures developed by necessity today disappear tomorrow unless they are still absolutely required.

If you do become difficult or cranky it is usually a result of someone else trying to impose some rule or boundary upon you personally, although your discomfort is almost always short lived and relatively painless for all involved. "

Give it a try: Here.
It's pretty quality, and seems to be spot on about a lot of things. =p Lol give it a whirl and if you feel cool postin your results, reply with em. Lol since it'd be interesting to see what it said for other ppl and if you feel it was accurate or not. *dun dun dun*

current mood: calm

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Tuesday - 7.6.04
2:15 - Originally written during work...and then added to =p
I’ve got a little bit of dead time at the moment so I felt like writing a quick update on life...things have been busy this week. I’ve been workin pretty hard and the early starts have definitely sucked...bloody 9 AM subjects =p. *shakes his fist in rage* But s’all good, woteva I guess. I’ve been doing a lot subject recruitment and video coding this week, as well as doing some work for the fellowship...Lol so some article reading and a comprehensive lit search. Boooo =p. But even with all this junk we still got some major down time where I just sit around and chill...and consequently type up entries to put in my journal on Word. =p

I caught Spidey 2 with some of the HS crew...not too shabby stuff. My friends weren’t exactly huge fans of it and think Fahrenheit 9/11 woulda been better but woteva =p. Lol I don’t know how I’ll end up voting in the election this November, they’re not exactly awesome candidates. =p

Anyways, I enjoyed Spidey 2 a pretty good amount…some quality action, humorous sequences, and some cheesy romantic scenes. It was a nice mix...although I definitely have to say a couple sequences were completely lame and unnecessary (a couple of the running sequences mostly =p). Props to Tobey Maguire and Kirsten Dunst for some quality acting, even if it was cheesy at times...they were pretty bloody effective and the sort of...humanity and vulnerability they displayed was quality. I’d say the movie was better than the first just on account of the different styles of villains. With the Green Goblin he was just a bloody crazy mofo who went wild and blew a whole bunch of crap up. With Doc Ock, there was, to thief a line from Hamlet, "...a method to his madness." I don’t want to give the movie away for all y’all who haven’t seen it, but I could partially empathize with him throughout the movie. Another element of humanity that was really effective in the story. =p Although (sorry to rant) I definitely am getting a little tired of all the overt religious imagery in movies, specifically Christian stuff. Blah. I’m not exactly a hardcore religious type (I consider myself an agnostic Buddhist…ol but also a Hsuist too hehehe ;p) but I’m cool usually with people who are very devout to their religion. But this is just an unnecessary imposition of religion onto the audience…seriously. It’s annoying, like they’re just trying to brainwash the masses. While I’m cool with people advocating their religion and reasonably arguing for their faith, when they start imposing it upon others and try to convert them all the time, telling them to repent their sins or they’ll flame in bloody hell then it goes over the line. I’m a big proponent of tolerance and acceptance and having that stuff thrown at you, shoved into your lap, is not something I’m really down with.
=p Sorry, I just had to unleash some of my own thoughts.

Anyways, I definitely have been slacking in terms of lax training. I haven’t been able to get on the wall or at the net much these past couple of weeks, which really sucks. I need to run heaps more and get back into shape (especially now that I’m back in CO and am dealing with thinner air =p). With some of the stipend money from this summer I’ve snagged a new goal, a target cover for the goal to improve my accuracy, and a massive 10x30 ft net to make sure we don’t lose any more balls to the freakin’ bushes all around our yard =p. Lol so hopefully by the end of this summer I’ll be a crazy sniper…my shot is already pretty accurate right now, and the speed is steadily increasing with all the practice I put in so it’s pretty badarse ;p. I’ve got a quick release so mayhaps I’ll run more man-up this summer to get some XP and work on things. Now if I could only just force myself to run more and regularly or had someone to go with =p. S’all good though I suppose, I’ve still got 2 months to run hardcore.

I’ve been trying to keep up a constant running pattern so that I don’t slack off, running everyday because if you have something every day you’re more likely to stick to it than if you were to do it on whims…But it’s definitely been hard, my left foot (well arch rather) is starting to kill when I’m walking around, and flares up when I run. I’ve started taking some Advil for it…I don’t know exactly why I’ve got a crazy left foot specifically, I’m not too sure if it’s the shoe, my running technique, or something I did to that foot specifically. But it’s annoying as hell cause I feel questionable on that foot sometimes. Hopefully it’s just one of those bits that goes away with time…we’ll see. If it keeps giving me crap, I’ll talk to the orthopedist about it or something.

Erg…2 months. Which means we’re exactly half way into summer. *gulp* That totally sux. =p I can’t believe we’re half done with summer, it felt like it just began yesterday. Lol I feel like I’ve gotten nothing done at all =p. It’s mostly been a blur of working in the lab, playing lax, and just chillin around, either at home or with friends (mostly the former though =p). I had a nice break up of routine with Chowdawg’s visit and APDCYSYPSR04 (WOOT WOOT!!! ;p) but now it’s back to the monotonous process of coding, recruiting, and reading from lab. *BLAH* =p It’s ok but seriously it’s all a blur of the same junk, day by day. Yarg…let’s hope this second half is bloody slow…but somehow I sincerely doubt it. Erg.

Survey Time...Collapse )

Anyways, i should crash since I have work again...but I feel a contemplative friends only entry coming up soonish so i'll write more well and take care all. =p

current mood: indifferent

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Tuesday - 6.29.04
1:34 - A random ponderance...
Is it love? Or is it the concept of being in love that thrills you?

current mood: contemplative

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1:18 - Quiz action just cause =p


?? Which Of The Greek Gods Are You ??
brought to you by Quizilla

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Monday - 6.28.04
13:03 - Join us, join us, join our cult, join our cult...
So werd to APDCYSYPSR04 (Asian Pacific Development Center Youth Strengthening Youth Program Summer Retreat’04)…what a bloody fun time ;p. And like all bloody fun times, it deserves a nice entry =p.

Read more...Collapse )
Overall I’d say this camp was alright…definitely better than the ’01 camp (Nhia’s camp with all the scandelousness like the bridge *dun dun dun* and idiotsville Hook-up-central…but not nearly as good as the ’02 or even ’03 camps. Probably just the location, especially the freakin’ nice rooms and lack of couch. *shakes his fist at Black Forest* Definitely made bonding and chillage a lot harder for everyone…There were at least a good group of kids this year, who I think will do well with the YC and YSYP next year. We’ll see how it all goes down though. =p I’d definitely have to say that my favorite camp overall was probably the ’00 or ’02 camp…lol ’00 cause it was the start and I met a whole group of good friends who I still talk to a lot, for the most part, and because of the COY bit too lol. It was definitely the starting point, and where I really changed and grew as a person. But then again ’02 was just amazing because of all the great great campers (werd to Chue and Vickie for being co-COYs woot woot ;p…lol plus my brother for representing =p), some of my fav JCs like Vina, Nhia, and Hanah, and some fun times and activities. Definitely just a general bonding and tightness…plus the spark most definitely ^_^. It also was such an amazing contrast compared to the relatively abysmal ’01 camp, and helped restore some faith in the program… =p Lol it was also my last camp as a JC and that was definitely a good time…kinda sad to think those days are done. But being an SC is pretty fun and a little more interesting, trying to maintain an overall camp cohesiveness and keep everyone interested and happy. It’s a different balance and different style...ah well, s'all good. I'm just still glad to be involved in the program. Anyways, enough of this little bit...hope that all is well in life. Be well and take care y'all.

current mood: silly

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Thursday - 6.24.04
11:35 - Werd to the Notorious KFP suckas ;p
Hey hey folks, what’s up? Lol at the moment I’m writing this from work so pardon the ghettoness of it…at the moment we’re really not up to anything and I have a whole hour to kill until I get an EEG/ERP lecture from the professor of this lab. Woot =p. So ya I’m chilling since most of the stuff we can do right now is done, aside from making stimuli for the experiments we’re running next week, and Josh is running out to get that. So woteva. Let’s do massive updatage since I haven’t really said anything fun or meaningful in a while… =p

”*SammyCollapse )

Other than that, nothing really has been going on I guess. Lol I started the Harry Potter series (thanks to Sarah) so that should be interesting. We’ll see how it all compares =p. *shrugs* Woteva I guess. Anyways, hope all is well with y’all. Be well and take care.

Oh and by the way, for all y'all yalies who read this, lol Conroy's gotten a couple nicknames at camp: Connorrhea and sure to make use of them this year ;o). Lol. Hehehehe.

Lol the APDCYSYPSR04 update is coming up in the next entry, no worries. I’m gonna try writing that too.

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Saturday - 6.19.04
4:21 - Survey and then some
Pictures from camp. I <3 APDCYSYPSR04. And i miss everyone. Going through withdrawal...

Survey madnessCollapse )

How to make a FireBrandt

1 part intelligence

1 part humour

3 parts leadership
Blend at a low speed for 30 seconds. Serve with a slice of fitness and a pinch of salt. Yum!

current mood: exhausted

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Thursday - 6.10.04
0:22 - Survey of madness, thiefed from Kenny
whats ur favorite
gum -|- Ice Breakers
restaurant -|- Imperial of unless it's for fast food, then Qdoba by a mile =p
drink -|- Almond milk/almond milk tea/arnold palmers/strawberry lemonades =p
type of weather -|- Sunny, very slight breeze, and warm (60s or 70s)
emotion -|- Happiness...would there be anything else? =p
thing to do on weekends -|- Chill with friends, play lacrosse ;p
late-night activity -|- Hang out online, chat with the homies :D
sport -|- LACROSSE!!!!! (of course) ;p
city -|- Denver or Sydney or Boston or HK
store - | - Breakaway Sports or Barnes and Noble (yes i'm a dork =p)

when was the last time you
cried -|- A couple years ago with Amy once...before then, a bloody long time
played a sport -|- Today (lax game...garrr, can't believe we lost by one, biatches =p)
laughed -|- A few minutes ago, talking to chowdawg =p
hugged someone -|- Yesterday (SARAH B IS BACK!!!! ^_^)
felt depressed -|- Don't remember
felt elated -|- A couple hours ago, when i found out who else was gonna be a SC at APDCYSYPSR04 =)
felt overworked -|- Lol...sorta today, s'all good
faked sick -|- Eh, i don't do fake sick =p
lied -|- No idea =p

what was the last
word you said -|- Later (got off the phone with chowdawg =p)
thing you ate -|- Stew and rice :D
song you listened to -|- Usher - Yeah (atm)
thing you drank -|- A mix of white peach grape juice and water, a perfect pick-me-up for lax
place you went to -|- Cornerstone park for lax
movie you saw -|- HP3, which was quality
movie you rented -|- No's been forever
concert you attended -|- Howieday @ Toad's place

who was the last person you
hugged -|- Sarah B =)
cried over -|- Amy P?
danced with -|- No's been too long =(
shared a secret with -|- Probably Laura M since i caught up with her over this weekend ;o)
person over your house -|- Dan frosh?
called/on the phone with -|- Chowdawg
went to a movie with -|- Jess and Sarah for HP3
saw? -|- Danny, at the game
were angry with -|- No idea... =p
couldn't take your eyes off of -|- Ummm...ya. No comment. =p
obsessed over -|- See above =p
liked that liked you back -|- Hrmmm...good question. Wish i really knew. Things seeem to enjoy being confusing...maybe Grace?

have you ever
danced in the rain -|- Aye
smoked a cigarette -|- Nopers
slept around -|- Hahaha in the non-scandelous way, aye...otherwise nope =p
partied til the sun came up -|- Nah...stayed up till the sun came up because i was chilling online, aye =p
had a movie marathon -|- Not since we did leprechaun at Sarah B's =(
gone too far on a dare -|- Lol i don't really do dares =p
spun until u were immensely dizzy -|- Aye
kissed someone or been kissed -|- Yep...

current mood: calm

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Tuesday - 6.8.04
0:45 - =p
Lol. Only some of my friends would appreciate this humor =p.

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Saturday - 6.5.04
2:29 - Ganked from my friend's Xanga

I AM: lost.
I WANT: happiness and success
I HAVE: a lot i want to accomplish in my life
I WISH: for a great many things...
I HATE: intolerance and blatant evil
I MISS: many people
I FEAR: failing others
I HEAR: the gentle hum of my computer as it runs
I SEARCH: my feelings for clarity
I WONDER: in the end, how much of a difference i'll have made in people's lives
I REGRET: losing sight of some things, being stupid about others
I LOVE: my friends and family...and lacrosse =p
I ACHE: for resolution of turmoil
I ALWAYS: overanalyze
I AM NOT: nearly as good as i want to be
I DANCE: to forget
I SING: to immerse myself in another world
I CRY: almost never
I WRITE: because it's a way to release
I WIN: because i'm extremely competitive
I LOSE: too much and too many things
I CONFUSE: others, and myself
I NEED: clarity, resolution, and knowledge
I SHOULD: go to sleep


You keep a diary: If this counts, yes
You like to cook: Aye, it's fun...too bad i don't have my 'rents' skeelz
You have a secret you have not shared with anyone: *shrugs and nods* Everyone does.
You set your watch a few minutes ahead: Not my watch but my alarm clocks.
You believe in love: Most definitely. Without love, life is empty.


The weirdest person you know: Me
The loudest person you know: Cierra
The sexiest person you know: I find different qualities alluring on different people.
The person that knows the most about you: Phuong or Sarah...some Sodany
Most boring teacher: Professor David Watts

Take a shower everyday: Aye aye
Think you know you've been in love: I don't *know* if i've been in love, but it felt like it at the time.
Want to get married: Most definitely
Have any tattoos/where: Nah
Piercings/where: Nothing
Get motion sickness: Yep...used to have it really bad as a kid. Hellz ya for Dramamine.
Think you're a health freak: Not always...considering i eat pretty much anything and everything
Get along with your parents: Sometimes...usually.
Like thunderstorms: They're alright.

Ryan: Matava, from HS who i used to be best buds with in middle school
Rob: Doerr, pro lax player
Drew: Gottenborg, friend from elementary who went to Kent and plays lax
Heather: from YSYP
Will: Mao, cool kid and also co-mod of TAS
Paul: who works at the Imperial and is cool to work with
Eve: She who had Multiple personality disorder (or DID now)
John: Nepil, who is at seminary @ St. John's to become a priest
Laura: Allen, an old friend from HS
Alex: the russian, one of my brother's friends
Justin: Khoo, a great friend from way back in the day
Ricky: =p
Jacob: Ahrendt...who has disappeared of the face of the earth after HS
Jack: the name of a character in a short story i wrote in 7th grade
Graham: David and Marianne Graham, crazy kids =p

Sign: Capricorn
Natural Hair Color: Black
Current Hair Color: Black...for now. =p
Eye color: Brown
Parents: Johnny and Anne (don't feel like using their Chinese names)
Siblings: My "little" brother Howard
Live with: the 'rents

Number: 43
Color: Dark Blue
Day: Friday
Month: January of course ;p
Song: I've filled this bit out a billion scrounge around on the other surveys and you'll have em.
Food: I am in the mood for Lamb Saag atm and perhaps some steamed chilean seabass with ginger and soy i eat pretty much anything and everything though
Season: Spring (lax season =p)
Sport: Seriously, do we need to ask? Baseball....NOT. LACROSSE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! =p
Drink: Arnold Palmer atm...although actually some Strawberry lemonade from Red Robins sounds good
Veggie: Spinach
Relative: My cousins? *shrugs*

Chocolate Milk, or Hot Chocolate: Hot Chocolate
Milk, Dark, or White Chocolate: Dark Chocolate...Amy pennington got me hooked lol
Vanilla or Chocolate: Vanilla usually

Cried: Nope.
Helped Someone: I've tried helping...whether it made a difference is another matter
Bought Something: Aye, an ethernet cable =p
Gotten Sick: Nope
Gone to the Movies: No actually
Gone out to Dinner: Aye
Said "I love you": Don't really have anyone to say it to...
Written a Real Letter: Nope
Talked to an ex: No actually
Missed an Ex: At times I wonder what they've been up to, but it's more curiousity then really missing them
Written in a journal: Lol of course.
Talked to someone you crush on: Aye.
Missed Someone: Of course.
Hugged Someone: they seem on short order i suppose...i miss those days
Fought with your parents: Nope.
Fought with a friend: No.

current mood: discontent

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Friday - 6.4.04
Your True Nature by llScorpiusll
The quality that most appeals to you:Empathy
In a survival situation, you:Act crazy as a diversion
Your hidden talent is:Spiritual wisdom
Your gift is:Irresistible attractiveness
In groups, you:Work for a common goal
Your best quality is:Your abundant energy
Your weakness is:Your lack of focus
Created with the ORIGINAL MemeGen!

current mood: crazy

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Wednesday - 6.2.04
3:21 -
Insane. Check it out lol.

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Tuesday - 6.1.04
4:26 - Losers always whine about their best, winners go home and f**k the prom queen.(Copied on Xanga)

(Taken from

Hellz ya 'Cuse. =p Props to Navy for playing an excellent close game. But gotta love the wonder that is Mike Powell and the Syracuse Orange. ^_^

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Sunday - 5.30.04
3:10 - Interesting...

What do you dream about?
Zodiac Sign:
Fav. Color Combo:
Your dreams generally include: Oceans and beaches
Approximate number of monthly nightmares: 62
The worst monster you've seen in a dream:
Your dreams are usually realistic
Percentage of dreams involving sex - 83%
Will your dreams ever come true? (8) - Yes - definitely. - (8)
This fun quiz by cutelilangelx - Taken 83474 Times.
New! Get Free Horoscopes from Kwiz.Biz

current mood: intrigued

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3:07 - Syracuse representing like they should.
(taken from

Other photos of the action...Collapse )

current mood: content

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Friday - 5.28.04
What do you want to be remembered for after your'e gone?

I think i'll answer this another night. =p

current mood: nostalgic

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