FireBrandt (Kean Bean ;p) (firebrandt) wrote,
FireBrandt (Kean Bean ;p)

Resolutions...written in July but posted now =p

2007 New Years (Mid-year/ three-quarter year) Resolutions?

1. Do well in grad school (more than grades: read more articles, participate more)- I really want to make the most of my time here, and do well. I’d like to be a sharp student who is known for being quick on his feet and knowledgable, with a knack for synthesizing and analyzing information. So that means reading more articles in my subject area of depression, exploring different research paths, taking a wider range of graduate courses so that I can become more of an interdisciplinary/renaissance psychologist and pull findings together from different areas. Also, it means not procrastinating as much on the work I need to do, writing up my IRB application promptly and assembling a research team and my research materials so that I can get my study running quickly, and generally taking more time and consideration in working on my papers, rather than leaving them until the last couple days before they’re due to write them up. I need to be more focused academically. I want to read a fair portion of the articles for class and be able to take away lessons from them to integrate with either my research or clinical skills.

2. Really get my research rolling (finish protocol/put together strong project/ train RAs) - As I alluded to above, I need to finish my IRB application first of all. I’ve got a research coordinator in mind, and with them, we can really get my master’s thesis rolling. I’ve finished the protocol, and defended it successfully (rather well, actually) so that’s good to go. I’m eager to get this project started and the ball rolling. I feel that inertia is really at play here; it’s so hard getting things started, but once it’s going it should be perfectly smooth and fine. I need to recruit roughly 120 subjects too, so it’ll be some hard work…but I think it can be done. Just gotta buckle down eventually.

3. Explore the dating scene (unless I find someone who really draws my attention) -
Hahahaha…with the exception of brief (3 months or less) interludes in my life where I’ve been lucky enough to have someone, I’ve been single for most of my life. I think only recently, after having been hurt and realizing I’ve needed to take some time for myself, have I actually come to accept and embrace being single. And coming off that, I might as well date people just to get to know them. I’d like to meet different, interesting people, particularly since I live in such a large city like Los Angeles, and just hang around and have a good time, without having to worry about whether things will be able to develop fully into a relationship. After all, isn’t this what young adulthood is all about? Exploring the dating scene, meeting people, finding out what’s important to you in other people? Might as well embrace it and enjoy it, rather than worry my arse off like before. Of course, if I do meet someone amazing, then I certainly won’t leave it out of the question to consider pursuing them. They’ll just have to be that worth it though. =p

4. Improve my dancing skills (just for kicks) - Hahahaha this is inspired from my time with VSA hip hop and the CASA Cultural show glowsticking demon crew. Hahahaha I’d like to learn to dance better, particularly with popping, liquid, and tutting. General hip hop dancing skills would be nice too. I am very tempted to join C3, USC’s hip hop dance team, who are all pretty freaking badarse. And I’ve heard that I would likely make the team with the dance skills I have, so I could use C3 as a platform to grow and improve myself. It would be a fun little side project.

5. Gain a lot of experience and knowledge from practicum. - This resolution is already half completed, considering I just finished my first term of actual practicum, working at an Alzheimer’s/Dementia research clinic giving neuropsych assessments. The experiences I’ve had through the clinic have been amazing and extremely interesting and informative. I’ve enjoyed my time there and really tried to take advantage of the supervision I was receiving as another method to grow and improve as a clinician and student of psychology. Next up is the advanced practicum in clinical psychology, for older adults. Essentially I’ll be doing therapy with older adults. It should be rather interesting and I’m looking to how things will go as I began my training as a clinician. *dun dun dunnnn* Hopefully I can hone my clinical skills quickly since I’ll be conducting therapy alone, sans co-therapist unlike most of my classmates (who are in the child/family practicum).

6. Sharpen my languages (ie Canto/Mando/Spanish, maybe add in some viet) - This mostly involves me using these languages more often, but it would definitely be good to actually re-study some of my old Chinese textbooks and try to reacquire some of vocabulary and reading/writing skills I’ve lost in the two years since I last took a Chinese course. Hopefully I can practice some of the oral skills and speak with others…I’m guessing that won’t be likely though. Maybe re-read some Spanish stuff too, and at least revive some basic use of the language. Hahahah right now my Spanish is extremely ghetto and limited. Whoops. Barely even remember how to conjugate regular verbs. =p

7. Exercise/weight train on a regular basis - This’ll probably be the most difficult resolution because of the sheer amount of time my other resolutions involve. I’d like to play lacrosse regularly as a form of exercise but the feasibility of that is limited. Running regularly would be a nice start, so that hopefully I can get back into the 6-minte mile form I used to be at the end of fall. Weight training would be really good so I can put muscle back on again and try to hit 145 or even 150. We’ll see if I can’t find a way to consider weight training as my release and use it as a method to relax. Lax still fits the bill best as my method of cooling off and thinking though. Hopefully I can play fall ball again with the club team as that was amazing and heaps of fun.

8. Maintain my Hsuistic perspective on life and continue to help others - I definitely would like to continue helping others how I can, whenever I can. The question really becomes whether I should focus more on those I’m treating in therapy or my friends, with this Hsuistic perspective. While I’d like to think I’m capable of both, the question really is whether I’d have enough energy and time to devote to both. Granted, therapy being part of my practicum and part of my academic experience, I’m going to likely prioritize my clients, but I don’t want to shortchange my friends at all. Oi. This is going to be a bit insane in terms of work. I guess I’ll have to rely on an opportunistic Hsuistic methodology and do what I can whenever I get a chance to.

9. Explore LA with someone(s?) – LA is a *huge* city. There are so many different things to do out there. I’d like to explore the different sights and sounds of the area, including orange county, and see what sorta beauty LA has. Beaches are prime targets, as well as nice shopping areas and promenades. I’ve done a fair job already by exploring Little Tokyo and Santa Monica, but there is soooo much more out there to be seen. Restaurants are also something I’d really like to explore too, considering there are so many different types of people out there and consequently a wide variety of different cuisines. So time to explore. :D


Past-resolution evaluation:

Since I never got a chance to write resolutions for 2006, I thought I’d evaluate my adherence to the 2005 resolutions over the past two years. So without further ado, here we go =p

2005 New Years (almost) Resolutions

1. Kick arse in school. – Ehhh I did ok…not wonderful. I didn’t fail but I did get two of my lowest GPAs out of all of college, so rather disappointing actually, especially when considering what sort of implications this had for my cumulative GPA. Bloody freaking hell. One was because of stupid freaking Immunobio, where the class was essentially uncurved even though it was a graduate level course and the average was a B- (which thankfully I got, at least). I heard only two undergrads had As in the course. Wtf. Beeyootttch. And I should have gotten a better grade in Psych Research methods. Basically submitted a slightly late paper screwed me over…I should have been like everyone else and gotten a Dean’s excuse and not gotten penalized. Fawk that. At least my last semester at Yale and first semester at USC went well academically, kicking some major arse. 2005=not so good…2006=pretty baller. Wheee :D

2. Stop falling asleep in class. – Ummm yeah, that failed miserably. There was at least one class per semester (except for my last one at Yale and this past fall here at USC) where I fell asleep almost every single class. Whoops. Guess they weren’t too good at keeping me entertained, or I was just that tired all the time. Probably the latter, on reflection. Again 2005 failed miserably while 2006 turned out well. Hrmmm…

3. Get major amounts of research done. – Eh. Not so good either. I got some research done but recruiting subjects was impossible, meaning I couldn’t get much data at all. Blargh. I feel bad about that failure still. Disappointing to say the least. I did get lots of experience though, and was active within the clinic. Here is sorta the reverse trend…I got more done in 2005 than in 2006. Doh.

4. Get back into shape for lax. – I’ve been in shape for lacrosse every season we’ve practiced/played, so that’s a check. This past fall season has actually been one of the most in shape times I’ve ever been. Hell, I was actually able to run about a 6-minute mile fairly consistently. SWEET. =p

5. Score an average of 2 points per lax game. – Ummmm, not as much. I’ve been improving somewhat, at least putting up some points each season, but never putting up a consistent production. I think I just need to play more often so that I can get more comfortable within the offensive flow. This past year during fall season I was able to do pretty well and get points almost every scrimmage we ran, usually playing well.

6. Maintain significant involvement with the groups i'm in. – Definitely check. I worked myself to the freaking bone for all the groups I was in and was one of the most active members and definitely one of the only seniors to keep that active with all the organizations I was involved in. If anything, I stepped up even more senior year, serving as captain of club lacrosse and as an ethnic counselor. I guess the only slight exception would be society, where I wasn’t able to devote as much time as I really wished. 

7. Cook well and for others. – Hahahahaha define well I guess? I cooked some, especially during summers, and we did throw potlucks so other people did eat my cooking. Some progress, but not much made during these past two years. My highlights of cooking include pasta and chicken for the granddaughter and some quality chicken and mushrooms made with Ms. Li. =p

8. Follow Hsuism like it's my JOB. – Definitely check on this one. I’ve been keeping close to the philosophy and definitely trying to help as many people in my life as possible. Serving as EC gave me an excellent venue to follow this. Serving as a crazy and involved senior also allowed me the opportunity to mentor a number of different people, which I truly valued. I’m glad I’ve been able to help out with what I can of late and play at least some part in people’s lives.

9. Get into a relationship and stick to my oath. - Ohhhh man. This definitely happened…twice. But both ended not so wonderfully. Argh. The first instance was wonderful and I really enjoyed being with her and getting to know her, but it puttered out on her end and things sorta crashed and burned from there. At least I stuck to my oath and tried my hardest to make her happy. The second instance, I stuck to my oath too and just enjoyed my time with her. It was a lot harder though because I was a still hurt over the first girl. As to why I got in a relationship with a second girl while I still was hurt/had feelings for the first girl, it wasn’t a smart decision on my part. I should have just left things to myself. I guess I was hoping that dating the second girl would help me move on from the first girl. It doesn’t help at all that there was no hope anymore for the first girl. That kinda kills any potential for trying to stick around. 


And of course, the quasi-resolution list:

Stop overanalyzing things.

Hahahahaha nope, definitely didn’t stop this. Failed miserably. Whoops. =p

Stop worrying so bloody much about finding a girl.

Never thought I would be able to pull this off, but definitely was able to… because the first girl crushed my heart into little pieces such that it just bled over into everything after. Definitely affected the second relationship and just left me feeling empty and like I needed to take time off from relationships and not put myself on the line for a while. So I made a decision not to get involved in a relationship for a long while, and not think about trying to get into one, and have stuck with that for a while. It’s taken up until this year, but I can at least say I’m feeling ok to move on, even if I still don’t things have been fully resolved. Maybe one day?

Stop staying up so late every night.

Hahahaha soooo…I dunno about this one. During my time at Yale and even this first semester at USC I’ve been majorly slacking on this one, and have stayed up until ridiculous hours on many an occasion. However, this past semester I’ve been really good about going to bed and getting a fair amount of sleep, mostly so that I don’t fall asleep at placement. At least now, I’m getting a regular amount of sleep, for the most part, and am generally feeling more alert and on top of things. =p

Get more muscles for lax.

Was pretty good about this one surprisingly, hitting about 145 at one point in time. However, without opportunities to work out of late, I’ve dropped back down to about 135-138. Damn. Gotta start lifting and eating more again, when I can, get more muscle back on me. At least I’ve retained some of the muscle I gained while trying to get bigger for lax.

Find a girl...

Done…but that didn’t work out so well. In either case. =\

Stop disenchanting all the girls I meet.

Hahahaha for once, this hasn’t haunted me. Thankfully. I did have some fan club members here and there so not everyone was so disenchanted with me. Then again, most of these girls were younger, so maybe they just liked the older guy thing. Who knows. Whatever =p. At least some part of me knows that I might not be so cursed…hahaahah then again, maybe that part of me isn’t actually me at all, but rather a friend who tries valiantly to reiterate that to me. =p

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